Echoes of the Heart Page 17

  He swept her up into his arms and carried her up the stairs and into his bedroom. Their bedroom.

  His eyes full of unbridled need, he set her down on the floor next to the bed and removed every stitch of her clothing with trembling hands, kissing her bare flesh as he went.

  Although she was exhausted from the day’s revelations, her body throbbed for the intimacy of Jake’s possession. She’d offered to walk away from him and he’d declined. Now, everything in her wanted to reaffirm that she was his lover. He was a powerful man and was capable of taking care of any bad publicity that came from his relationship with her. He’d already survived the no-confidence motion.

  No more running away. For as long as it lasted, she would enjoy this relationship and would not allow herself to have any regrets.

  When at last she stood naked before him, he divested himself quickly of his clothing and she gulped at the sheer perfection of him. Seconds later she was back in his arms as he eased her back onto the bed.

  ‘Just relax, sweetheart,’ he commanded.

  Jake’s arms around her were heavenly and for the first time in years their closeness felt honest as well as right. There were no secrets between them. No time limits. No pretence she was there under an obligation, or that he was trying to purge her from his system. They were together because it was what they both wanted and, God help her, she was going to try to build on what they had and make it last.

  ‘Enjoying yourself?’ he asked, bending over her.

  A shiver of response passed through her body as his teeth nibbled at her ear. ‘Yes, but —’

  ‘But?’ he repeated with mock indignation.

  ‘But —’ She rolled him over, then sat on his thighs. ‘— this is better.’ Facing him she let one hand rest against his chest and with the other, she reached for his arousal.

  ‘That’s...sweet torture,’ he groaned as her hand firmed around his length and began to stroke up and down.

  His quick in-drawn breath was audible.

  Amanda leant forward and allowed her hair to brush over his chest. Satisfied by the strong, rapid heartbeat under her palm, she removed her hand from his chest and onto the mattress to support her weight while her other hand continued its rhythmical slide up and down. Boldly, she slid the tip of her tongue along his lower lip.

  His eyelids snapped open.

  ‘I need to be inside you,’ he whispered against her mouth, his voice hoarse with longing.

  ‘And I need you to be inside me.’ Amanda couldn’t contain herself from taking Jake deep within her. A slight movement of her hips and the tip of his erection was positioned right at the opening of her womanhood. She muttered a protest as his strong hands settled on her hips, stilling any further movement.

  ‘This isn’t just about sex, Amanda. I want you to know that.’

  The promise of his words made her fall in love with him a little bit more, but right at that moment she needed to be filled by him. Needed him inside her so badly that if he didn’t let her take him in, she would go crazy. She pushed against the resistance of his hands and watched him throw his head back and groan as she speared his body into hers.

  Jake thought he’d erupt as she kissed his mouth and rode him with a fierce hunger that would not be denied.

  This wasn’t the way he planned it. Wanting to take things slowly, he’d envisaged a long, sensual seduction. He’d wanted their lovemaking to be a thorough demonstration with his entire body of just how much he loved her.

  It was out of his hands because she’d taken control. As pleasure flowed through him, he recognised the fact that she needed to assert herself and dominate him. She was taking him and it was wild, savage sex. Their coupling was a statement of intent—she wanted to set the boundaries and let him know she wasn’t going to play a submissive role in his life.

  It both surprised and delighted him. Far from wanting her as a passive wife, he wanted her to stretch her wings and fly, to reach her full potential and be the happiest, most confident person she could be.

  His hands savoured the smoothness of her back then lowered, grasping the flare of her hips and the perfect firm roundness of her bottom. Short fingernails dug into his shoulders and she groaned into his mouth in response to his touch.

  The tension within him built. With every thrust of her hips his need for release was more acute. Every muscle strained as he tried to hold on to his control. The most sensitive part of him throbbed and burned to explode within her silken sheath.

  Breathing hard, she tore her lips from his, and kissed along his jawline, her tongue flicking along the ridge. The grip on his shoulders bordered on painful, then she arched her back. His arms supported her as she spasmed around him, again and again. Muscles clamped around him. Released. Clamped. It was impossible to hold off any longer. He closed his eyes tight, then shuddered as he climaxed with her.

  When he opened his eyes the tears streamed down her face, but she sent him a tired, teary smile.

  ‘I needed that,’ she confessed with a sheepish expression.

  He couldn’t suppress his laughter. ‘I noticed.’

  The happiness in her expression as she joined in his laughter made her more beautiful than ever, but his laughter died in his throat, and he regarded her seriously. Despite all his earlier urgings, he couldn’t hold himself back.

  ‘Marry me, Amanda.’

  Chapter 12

  Amanda froze. Hardly daring to breathe, she stared at Jake’s serious expression, wondering whether she’d misunderstood.

  ‘You want to marry me?’ she asked shakily. Every sense was on full alert, each nerve stretched taut awaiting his reply.

  ‘More than anything,’ he said with a tender smile.

  It isn’t possible, she told herself, frowning and shaking her head.

  ‘I love you, Amanda.’ There was no hesitation in his words—his voice was firm and clear. ‘I went through hell when you married Bennett. I misjudged you and I’ve treated you so badly since he died that I know you must doubt my love, but I’ve never stopped loving you.’

  Joy burst through her heart at his words and the emotion in his eyes.

  ‘I want you as my wife. We’ve spent too many years apart and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.’

  Her lips trembled into a smile and she pressed them together. Removing her hands from his shoulders, she raised her hands to her mouth, unable to believe that she could feel so happy.

  Jake’s proposal was real. Here she was sitting naked on his thighs after incredibly satisfying sex, and he wanted to marry her.

  This declaration of love and a chance at a future together was what she had longed for since the moment she met him. Yet she hesitated.

  Amanda looked away from him, seized by nerves. Reality crashed in and all her old demons raised their ugly heads. Uncertainty gripped her as she worried the love they felt for each other wouldn’t be enough to make their relationship last. The differences between their upbringings and lifestyles were hurdles that stretched ahead of her on a long track. They seemed insurmountable. The decision was hers. Would she falter at that first jump?

  A little whimper escaped through her lips and she tried unsuccessfully to push herself out of his embrace. ‘How can I possibly marry you, Jake?’

  The tormented, half-sobbed words wrenched at his heart. ‘Amanda —’

  ‘I’m from a different class,’ she explained, turning her head away from him to hide her tears.

  ‘Class?’ The word was snarled with contempt.

  ‘I’ll always be the girl from the housing commission area,’ she returned with hopelessness and agony. ‘I’ll never be accepted by your friends or your family. I’ll always be seen as an opportunistic gold-digger.’

  He raised one of her hands to his face, and her eyes followed the movement. ‘Feel me, Amanda. I’m a flesh and blood man.’ The same hand was lowered to his chest and she felt the strong beat of his heart. ‘This heart beats for you. Only for you. Do you think it matters to me
where you lived? Isn’t it only what I believe about you, what I feel for you, that counts?’

  Swallowing hard, she shook her head sadly. ‘I was never accepted by the crowd Lloyd socialised with —’

  ‘Forget Bennett!’ Jake declared, his whole body tensing with suppressed fury.

  He took her hand to his lips and pressed loving kisses against her skin as he tried to control his anger at the mention of Bennett’s name and his frustration at her resistance. ‘This is about you and me, Amanda. This is not about the past. It’s about the future and the love I feel for you.’

  Everything in her wanted him to persuade her they had a future together, but she was so unsure.

  He smiled tenderly as he stroked her lips with his thumb. ‘I love you with all that I am.’ The words were like an oath.

  Twin tears spilt from her eyes. He wiped each of them away gently with the fingertips of one hand.

  ‘There’s something I need to know,’ she said slowly.

  ‘Ask,’ he agreed readily.

  Nerves assailed Amanda. Was she ready for the answers to the questions she needed to ask?

  ‘If you weren’t going out with Sophie when we met, how did you end up marrying her?’

  For a few seconds he was still, while she tried to steady her nervous, shallow breaths.

  Dark eyes lifted and held hers. ‘Sophie was a very close friend—she still is,’ he said at last. ‘We were lovers briefly when we were much younger—before I met you—but we’ve always remained friends.’ He glanced away for a few seconds before continuing. ‘Because we often went out to the same parties together people assumed we were a couple. While I wasn’t committed to anyone else, I agreed to keep up that impression.’

  A frown creased Amanda’s brow. ‘Why?’

  Jake’s jaw tightened. ‘Sophie’s grandfather is a real tyrant. He kept pressuring her to marry and he was keen for her to marry me.’

  ‘She must have wanted to marry you.’

  ‘No. She met someone she loved and she was engaged to him when I met you.’

  Her head felt heavy on her shoulders as she shook it slowly. ‘But your friends said you’d had an argument. They were sure you’d get back together.’

  He shrugged. ‘Nobody else knew the truth.’

  ‘Jake,’ she protested. ‘You married each other.’

  He let out a breath. ‘Sophie knew her grandfather wouldn’t approve of the guy she loved and she planned to elope.’ He brushed a kiss against her forehead. ‘We let our families and friends think we were having a bit of a lover’s tiff—that way Sophie could be with her fiancé and plan her marriage without her grandfather preventing it.’

  Amanda sat perfectly still and looked at Jake. Really looked at him. His expression was so sincere there was no doubt in her mind he was speaking the truth, but it didn’t make sense.

  ‘But you loved her,’ she insisted.

  ‘I didn’t love her, except as a friend.’

  ‘Why didn’t she marry her fiancé?’

  His mouth twisted. ‘She paid him a surprise visit and found him in bed with someone else.’

  Shock made her lips part and her free hand flew to cover her mouth. She felt sympathy for Sophie, but she was still lost in confusion. Her hand dropped down again. ‘That still doesn’t explain why you married her, Jake.’

  His lips compressed then twisted ruefully. ‘Both of us were disillusioned at the time. I was totally gutted that you’d married Bennett—even more so to think you were pregnant with his child.’

  ‘I —’

  He held up a hand to prevent her words. ‘Sophie and I turned to each other for support. Sophie’s grandfather was still making her life hell and we decided our friendship would be a solid basis for marriage. That we knew each other and could trust each other.’

  Amanda’s heart fisted. Jake had possessed something with Sophie that he and Amanda had never shared—friendship and trust. The painful sensation intensified as she reminded herself the couple had much more in common than that. They’d both come from super-wealthy families, moved in the same elite social circles.

  Defeated again, and incredibly exhausted from the way her emotions had continually bounced from high to low, she leant back and Jake released her hand.

  ‘That’s the truth, Amanda. I was never in love with Sophie.’

  For a moment she raised her hands to cover her closed eyes. ‘You might have felt that way, but what about Sophie?’ she asked.

  ‘Believe me, we weren’t struck by Cupid’s arrow. There wasn’t even any sexual pull for either of us by that stage.’

  That was hard to believe. Amanda couldn’t imagine any woman could be just a friend to Jake. His sexual magnetism was too strong. Every female head had turned when they walked through Circular Quay earlier that evening, and she was certain it was due to Jake’s incredible sex appeal rather than the fact that he was instantly recognisable to most Australians.

  ‘Are you certain Sophie didn’t just tell you she had no deeper feelings for you so that you would marry her?

  ‘I think we both knew we’d made a mistake from the moment the priest said you may kiss the bride.’

  ‘Are you telling me you weren’t lovers during your marriage?’ The confronting question was uttered before she thought about it.

  He shifted uncomfortably. ‘We tried that, but it was a dismal failure. The chemistry just wasn’t there, and without that spark, friendship wasn’t a strong enough basis to keep our marriage glued together. We realised that neither of us were doing the other or ourselves any favours by staying in a platonic marriage.’

  The discomfort he felt was palpable and she sensed it was a hard admission for him to make. ‘Thank you for your honesty.’

  ‘I’ve never cheated on anyone.’ His tone was imperative. ‘You were the only woman in my life back then. You are the only one in my life and you always will be.’

  Insecurity in herself and in her relationship with Jake had made her run from him. She’d been wrong, and her heart was heavy with regret. They’d lost two years they should have been together, and because of her lack of faith they had both suffered. She should’ve trusted him—given their relationship a chance. Feelings of inadequacy and lack of self-confidence had made her vulnerable to the comments of others.

  ‘You’ve apologised for misjudging me but I’ve been equally as guilty of misjudging you,’ she admitted tearfully.

  ‘Circumstances didn’t help us,’ he acknowledged with an edge of bitterness. ‘Neither did lack of trust. But we’re both older and wiser now.’

  Somehow, she had to find the courage to be with the man she loved and face her critics instead of hiding away.

  ‘Whatever the future brings, we’ll face it together.’ Each of his words implored her to give their relationship a chance.

  ‘What about your parents? I know your father doesn’t approve of me,’ she said sadly.

  ‘My father has always wanted what is best for me, and that’s you. I think he’ll accept that now. He knows Sophie and I weren’t suited.’

  ‘But, my reputation...’

  ‘I would like to explain the circumstances of your marriage to him. I think it would be hard for him to accept you without that knowledge. But ultimately, he needs to know that I love you and that nothing and nobody will ever stand in the way of our happiness again.’ He pulled her into his arms.

  ‘I do love you —’

  He made a triumphant sound then captured her face in his hands, sealed his lips to hers in exultation. ‘You don’t know how long I’ve waited to hear you say that!’

  ‘You’ve always been in my heart, always been the one I love.’

  ‘I feel the same, baby.’

  Jake’s love for her, his belief in her was evident in the sincerity of his expression. He was right. The past had to be left where it belonged. It was the future that counted, and they could face that together. But although she knew he would always support her, she realised her strength had to com
e from within. Self-belief. That was what was important if their love was to survive.

  ‘I want you as my wife.’ He kissed her again. This time his kiss was a heady mix of promise and passion. When he finally broke contact with her lips, her mouth trembled. ‘Marry me, Amanda.’

  Silence stretched and it seemed they both held their breaths as she searched deep into her soul.

  Her lips broke into a tremulous smile and once again the tears tracked down her cheeks. ‘Yes, Jake,’ she agreed on a rush of breath. ‘I’ll marry you.’

  The kisses he gave her were an outpouring of how much he loved her. Every inch of her was worshipped by him. She cried out his name in ecstasy as he took them both to the heavens again.

  Epilogue

  Five weeks later, Amanda danced the bridal waltz in Jake’s arms while Irene looked on with pride.

  ‘Irene’s really enjoying herself,’ Amanda said happily.

  ‘She’s not the only one,’ Jake murmured against her ear. His right hand slid to the curve of his bride’s bottom and pulled her closer to him.

  Amanda shivered with longing and battled to keep her thoughts on their surroundings as they moved together. ‘I think that new drug treatment is helping her.’

  ‘It’s early days yet, my beautiful bride, and you know that the drug is no miracle cure,’ Jake cautioned, placing a gentle yet still scorching kiss on her temple. ‘But she’s definitely recovering from her stroke.’

  Amanda removed her hand from Jake’s and slid her arms around his waist then up his back, nestling her head against his shoulder. ‘Everyone seems happy for us.’

  ‘They are. Not only have you made a wonderful impression on my friends, but they can see how happy you make me.’

  ‘Your mother has been so warm to me.’

  ‘And Dad has been cautiously accepting!’

  She laughed. ‘I’ll have to work on him.’

  ‘Darling, I have every confidence that you’ll have him eating out of your hand in no time.’

  ‘But you know, I really like Sophie,’ she confessed, looking up at Jake. ‘I expected to feel self-conscious with your ex-wife and more than a little jealous, but she put me at ease when we had lunch last week with your mother. I think we’ll be good friends.’